things i learned

What I learned from my self-help books on relationships is this: Always take things slow, proceed with caution, stay firm to your own terms and never ever have sex with the guy until you've gone out with him for at least six months until wherein you can determine whether you are a 'good for now' girl or the girl 'for keeps'.

This is an advice I should have read about before jumping into the previous relationship. Seriously.

Anyway, there's this guy who's quite interested in me. We met online via match.com and we went out for the second time today. He's quite all right, different from the last four guys definitely in that he's more generous with his money (he wanted to buy me shoes today and I got dragged into this shoe store to try on some pairs but I lied that the shoes weren't comfy - I am so gonna buy this one nice pair soon, without him of course), more gentlemanly (he carries all my things, never mind if it's just a small plastic bag containing seven big curry puffs from Old Chang Kee) and for now, not someone I will term arrogant or has a big ego. He's all right I guess. A bit nerdy looking, but not too bad.

But he's not exactly what I'd say someone who'll have me lusting over him.

So well, he wants to see me like, every day. I'm the only girl he is seeing (he likes to concentrate on one girl at a time and here I am, sort of trying to serial date like the books said I should) and the worst part is, he told his mom about it and the mom's fine with it. Today's only the second time we've met!

It's kinda funny, me trying to rationalise with him and telling him to take it easy, that he still hasn't seen the rotten side of me and that it takes more than just two dinner dates to really get to know a person.

I am not discouraging him. It's just that the last two relationships, especially the last one, really did teach me the value of sticking around long enough until you know the person for who he really is, rotten side and all because once you've fallen (or once I'd fallen) you are most likely to hang around despite finding out the guy's really quite crappy after all because you're in too deep and will endure the pain until comes a point where you can take it no more.

And there's the other guy... whom I kissed the other night.

Ah, I miss him so much tonight! I miss his strong arms and warm embrace, the heady scent of his perfume. The eyes that burn so intensely, yet twinkle with humour.

I am so fucked.